"Our dreams came true when we joined the family of three powerhouse personalities. Their jigsaw pieces fit into this beautiful little life we now all share together."
Ethan and Matthew's adoption journey could be compared to a rollercoaster; lots of ups and downs, highs and lows, but ultimately well worth the ride.
"We applied for the process not really knowing what to expect. Our support worker and then eventually our social worker were and remain a fantastic help.
"Our social worker has been a life-changing advocate for us as well as a voice at times we needed one. Their guidance throughout the adoption pathway has been invaluable and they will always hold a special place in our family for bringing us together.
The application process itself is both the easiest first step to make as well as the start of a commitment in a long adventure to finding the family we were meant to become. Our assessment we have always likened to therapy. Sharing ourselves and who we are, working through and discussing all aspects of our own histories and families, lives and experiences, and ultimately emerging with a deeper understanding of the family we would eventually find.
The amount of preparations by way of training in understanding how the path of every adopted child is different was, and remains, a life changing experience. So much so we have always advocated for all parents, adoptive or otherwise, to explore how children experience the world and how understanding their understanding of things can shape their early years as well as their futures.
Once we had completed the more formal part of our adoption application and had been approved, we began our matching journey.
The reality of the experience is there are a lot of high points, but also many lows. Frustration, uncertainty, and anxiety were commonplace. However, as the saying goes, good things come to those who wait and this certainly was proven to be accurate.
We were matched after some months to our son and daughter. Shortly after we became a family, we found out that they had a baby brother on the way who eventually came to live with us after he was born.
We met with the children’s birth parents after we were matched and this was an experience we will always support others to do where possible. It gave us the chance to meet each other which we feel was an important moment to be able to tell our children in the future. We talked and learned about each other, learned how the children got their names, their favourite meals as well as special experiences and memories we could pass on. Invaluable knowledge more than could be found on official applications and paperwork.
We had never had any preference to gender, age or other background, but we had always hoped to adopt a sibling group. Knowing that siblings are less likely to be adopted together, and both coming from families with brothers and sisters, we knew our family needed to be one filled with lots of little voices.
The early days of placement seemed to be a honeymoon; every day seemed magical. The months that followed were some of the most challenging times, but importantly were by far the most rewarding times of our lives.
The advice from the social care team along with the tools available to us as adopters and adopted children, help groups, training, and family events along with many other forms of support have helped give us and our children the best opportunities to grow together.
As more months passed we really found the swing of things and with routine, time, and experience we settled in to our new rhythms. The days are filled with fun and adventure and the most random of conversations of which you can only have with children.
Our dreams came true when we joined the family of three powerhouse personalities and their jigsaw pieces fit into this beautiful little life we now all share together.
*Names and images have been changed to protect the children's identities.
If you're thinking about adoption, then you can find out more at one of our information events.
Book a place at an information event
If you're thinking about adoption, then you can find out more at one of our information events.
Book a place at an information event
If you'd prefer to speak to someone, then give us a call on 0300 123 6727 and we’ll be in touch with you as soon as possible.
